


Mess Is Mine

by emilyw_isqueen



Category: NCIS
Genre: Angst(?), F/M, not great tbh, we'll go with it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-21
Updated: 2019-03-21
Packaged: 2019-11-27 03:06:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18188966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilyw_isqueen/pseuds/emilyw_isqueen
Summary: "Do you think I liked hurting you? Having to lie to you? Do you think I did it for fun?"





	Mess Is Mine

**Author's Note:**

> A/N- I wrote this a few months ago. It was gonna be a two parter but I never got around to writing the second.
> 
> A/N(14/03/19) Hi, I wrote this in the backend of 2018 and never managed to write the second part. I'm so sorry I'm so inactive. But, here you go? Also I get my BTEC music results tommorow and I'm not ready whoooooooop(update; i got a merit, so i don't have to retake it :) )

"Do you think I liked hurting you? Having to lie to you? Do you think I did it for fun?"

Ellie shook her head profusely as she listened to the same questions he had been repeating, "No, you did it for your job. I know that. But what I can't understand is why you didn't even tell me you had to leave for any reason. You just went, unannounced, leaving me unprepared, with our two kids to look after, constantly asking where their dad was. And if I knew that this stupid little mission that the director sent you on had such a high percentage that you could've died, trust me, I would've been up there arguing, fighting for you to stay. But it's like you didn't even think to fight once."

Nick leaned against the front door of their apartment, processing the amount of words she had just compiles into one paragraph, "If I didn't do it I would've lost my job."

She exhaled shakily, not moving from her cross-legged position on the couch, "I know. And, yes, I know your job and NCIS is super important to you. But—but I thought that your children and I would be more important in your mind."

Ellie redirected her gaze to the floor as her eyes watered.

Nick's face formed into a frown as he moved from the door, sitting down next to her on the couch, "Ellie, of course you and the kids are more important than my job."

He moved closer to her, going to put his arm around her. She quickly batted him away, standing up and away from his grasp, "Don't touch me."

"Ell, please."

Ellie moved to the other side of the coffee table, her actions quick, a mix of confusion, impatience and irritation running through her veins as she moved.

"No, listen to me," Ellie asked, though it was more a demand at this point, "You've been back for two weeks, and it has taken my persistent pestering to get you to tell me where you were. Why are you so ashamed about this mission? What happened, Nick?"

By this point she was shouting, tears brewing in her eyes as she spoke, her words full of raw emotion.

Nick looked to the floor, not being able to face her, not being able to face what he had to do and how he felt.

"Tell me, Nick! What happened to make you so distant from all of us?" She questioned once again, yelling, pushing him past the line of secrecy.

"I had to sleep with someone else!" He snapped, raising off of the couch, "I had to do it to keep my cover!"

Ellie felt her arms go limp as the unfamiliar dry mouthed, lost feeling arrived, setting up camp in her heart. She furrowed her eyebrows as she blinked, letting a tear run down her face.

"Ellie, say something, please."He watched as she shifted her glassy eyes to his own, "I'm sorry. We have to talk about this. Properly-"

"How was she?" She stared directly back at him, squinting slightly, her vision blurry.

He shot her a confused look, "What? B?"

"You said you wanna talk about it. So, let's talk." Moving forwards slightly she sniffled, bringing her hands together, "Did you enjoy it?"

He frowned, not understanding her need for this answer, "Ellie-"

"Did you enjoy it, Nick?!" She shouted, tilting her head in the process.

"Yes!" He shouted back in her direction, "Any man would."

As soon as it came out of his mouth, he knew he'd said completely the wrong thing.

Ellie took a shaky, shallow breath in, before moving towards Nick, "I don't care what any man would feel. I care what you would."

Her voice was softer now, hurt coursing throughout it. She didn't know what she'd been expecting him to say, but that sure as hell was not it.

"Ellie, I'm sorry." His voice broke as he spoke softly.

She shook her head as she moved away, walking towards their bedroom.

"Please, Ellie. Ellie, I'm sorry. Eleanor."

She continued walking, opening the room door, "Leave me alone."

Nick watched on as she stepped in, closing the door, leaving him on the other side, a few inches from the wood. He stared at the blank door as his eyes watered, knowing what he had done.

Taking in a snuffled deep breath, he let his head fall against the wooden door, his arm already leaning against it.

He heard a little shuffling behind him, making him turn back, to look behind him.

"You should be in bed, novia." He spoke softly towards his daughter.

"Can't sleep." She moved slowly onto the couch, prompting her father to do the same, wrapping an arm around her.

He looked down at her, "What's wrong?"

Isabella returned the glance, looking up him with a curious look on her face, "Why are you and mommy fighting?"

Nick heart dropped through the floor as she asked, "Daddy had to do something for work and-- and Mommy doesn't like it."

She looked up at him, a little frown present as she thought, "But you and Mommy love each other."

"Yeah, we do. But even when two people love each other they can fight."

He watched as she furrowed her brows, before nodding, accepting the idea that her father had put forward. She hugged the stuffed animal, that sat between her arms tighter to her chest, "Are you and mommy gonna be fine?"

Nick pulled his daughter closer, "Hopefully."


End file.
